April Heart Check

5 minutes

Those working-from-home days; I absolutely love my new life and my new job : ))

As April comes to a close, I think back to what a victorious month this has been for me. January was peaceful and restful. February was pressured and numbing. In March I was fretting and trying to figure out the way forward in both my personal and professional life. April has been my most relaxed and happiest month yet this new decade as a 7-day hibernation over the Easter weekend saw me emerge refreshed and restored in more ways than I had anticipated. I’ve never been more sure of myself in Christ than I am in this season. I’m watching uncertainly fall away from my life as the Lord makes me more sure-footed. As I dig deeper into His word, my faith is strengthened daily as my life firmly anchors in Him.

The pandemic, while claiming precious lives and causing havoc and untold suffering for million others, has been kind to me. It has helped resolve various pertinent issues that had been upended in my life. It decided my geographic location after I had decided to move across the country, expressly against the Holy Spirit’s leading (God is merciful thankfully). It settled the issue of property ownership when I was considering ditching and running to the other side of the world; again, expressly against the Holy Spirit’s leading (thankful for God’s mercy). It resolved for me to stand still and walk by faith by arresting illicit activities on the other side of the planet. It gave me time off of work that I was so close to walking away from without a plan B (praise be the God). It has given me the much needed rest and respite from burnout that was threatening to pull me under and I had zero energy left to fight. The pandemic has been kind to me and mine. And we know that all things work together for the good of those who love God, to them who who are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).

God is faithful dear ones; in restoring our lives, he starts from the very beginning, leaving no stone unturned. He takes all the dreams we’ve had even when we were children; He starts with those and makes them come true. When God sets about restoring our lives, He does a thorough job and leaves nothing to chance. I am learning that when God gives us a promise, we must stay with it and stake our claim, even unto death if it comes to that; it is a better inheritance to leave your progeny. Stay at your appointed post and wait for the Lord’s deliverance, He will certainly come. We pose the greatest threat to the enemy when we are able to hold on to a promise from God and run with it all the way to the finishing line. And God is only able to work with us when we trust and believe in His ability to do what He said He would do. God is only able to be glorified through us if we stay the course and hold on to the promise to the very end. Abraham believed against all hope; even when all hope was gone, he still believed. As a result, it was credited to him as righteousness – Genesis 15:6.

God is answering my prayers in unimaginable ways, desires I have had from when I was but a babe growing up under my parent’s watchful eyes are gradually becoming my new reality. These lifelong dreams and desires that I’ve had had been buried as I walked and lived in reality, but in this realm of the spirit, everything is possible and you can pray things into the earth realm, from heaven down to earth. I am living my very best life right now here on earth as my Father re-writes my story. He says in His word that if we delight ourselves in Him, He will fulfill the desires of our hearts (Psalm 37:4), and that is exactly where I find myself in my life right now. I am exactly where He needs me to be to work His amazing and life changing truths into my life and I am sharply yet gently being molded at the potter’s wheel.

I must say though, the flip-side of spiritual growth is that you become even more aware of your glaring faults!! One would think that getting closer to God purifies us, which is true in essence, only that that proximity makes us painfully aware of our shortcomings. I have never been more aware of sin in my life as I am now. Every little bit of it is highlighted and I am none the wiser for it. I start my day by asking Him for my renewed mercy portion for that day because I’ve never been more keenly aware of my need for His mercy and grace. I often wonder how life would be if we were to earn this salvation by our good works -yeah, that would never work. I so need His new mercies every day as it seems lately I use them up daily! I mess up more times than I care to count, but I am blessed that He has provided a way out for us each time we fall short.

My life is busy with some of the most life-giving activities one could ever imagine, maybe I’ll share these with you as time goes by. I meant to write a series on the fruit of the spirit, but I seem to have abandoned the project for now. No worries, it’s only temporary. Life is weird for all of us right now and some of us are just trying to catch our breath for now, or stay alive. I will at some point get back to that as I’m sure no one is holding their breath : )) The series I am dying to get back to is the ‘Debunking Selfhood’. I am super passionate about this topic as I feel it derails quite a number of us into thinking we are on the right track since it mixes spirituality with faith but leaves out the most important and transformational aspects of it. In all honesty, I see a book in that series and I cannot wait to write it all at some point.

I’m currently very busy with other work that I’m doing from home as I have surrendered my wings for a year to catch up with other ever more important aspects of this precious life that my Father has given me. I’m jazzed that He breaths the breath of life into my body every single second to keep me alive, I find this thought SO very fascinating, it aways makes me smile to feel so loved and cared for by the one that created the universe and everything and everyone in it, big and small. That if He stopped breathing His breath of life into me to keep me alive, my life would end and my body turn to dust -how amazingly powerful is that realization!! Ponder that, just Selah with it for a moment, I’ll get back to you soon loved ones -later!!


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