Thank you | A Grateful Heart

2 minutes I have so enjoyed challenging myself this month to write a post everyday this Vlogtober month. I enjoy blogging very much because I seem to need to write both on my darkest days as well as my most exciting ones. Tracking along on my social media is Twitter (another writing platform), the only platform that’s remained active and alive no matter what season of my life I’m in. By this, I can tell that I am a writer. I live and breathe to write. It should come as no surprise to someone that has journaled their entire life. It’s how I…

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The Kindest People

3 minutes Random acts of kindness warm our hearts whenever we read about them or are privy to them firsthand.  It’s amazing what a smile can do, how many other smiles it can ignite to light up our faces and our world. A father helping a son tie his shoelaces; a mother lovingly caring for her family; a sibling covering for another; friends supporting each other; neighbors living in harmony; colleagues helping each other; acquaintances cheering each other on -these random acts of kindness restore our faith in humanity; humans holding themselves to an unwritten and unspoken code of moral conduct.  What…

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The Human Condition | The Questioning Agnostic

6 minutes I came from believing in God to questioning everything. I would never have guessed that would be me; yet here I was, wondering about the validity of everything I had been raised to believe. It’s not so much that I doubted the existence of God, I simply developed apathy towards the whole God Debate, eventually taking the position that any knowledge of God is unknowable and beyond our grasp as we couldn’t know with certainty, and that I wouldn’t let it bother me either way. This questioning had first popped into my mind in the year 2000 when I joined…

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The Human Condition | The unbelieving Atheist

6 minutes A while back, I posted this blog listing several states of the human condition vis-a-vis God. In this post, I want to take a closer look at the unbeliever. These are our atheists who worship at the altar of science, refusing to acknowledge the existence of a creator. In general, this group consists of men that remain unaware of a creator, men that reject a creator, choosing instead to believe in the big bang theory, and vehemently refuting the idea of intelligent design.  Types of Atheists As far as types of atheists, we have the humanist atheists who focus on…

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A life of Integrity | Poem

3 minutes To the faithful you show yourself faithful; to those with integrity you show integrity. (2 Samuel 22:26, NLT). When I hear the word integrity, a man like Job comes to mind. A man like my dad comes to mind too, but that’s a different blog, so let’s stick to Job in this one. Even when he had every reason to curse God and die, he chose not to. And when God challenged him about his lamentations, he had the integrity to keep silent and take back his words –Job 42:3 “You asked, ‘Who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?’…

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Marriage | A Humbling Season 

5 minutes On the subject of humility, there is so much to say as it applies to marriage. I have been through so much training in the ‘school of the spirit’ on this subject. We are living in times where there is such a heavy push to tame the patriarchy, even strip it off its strappings to even the playing field and reverse its fortunes. Unless we are submitted to the authority of God’s word in our lives, it’s easy to get swept away in the current and push back against the male role positioning. I have never bought into the rhetoric…

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A Wise Woman Builds | A Foolish One Tears Down

5 minutes Hi everybody! I gave you an earfull yesterday, so today I just want to leave you with someone else’s teaching. I’m signed up to receive daily proverbs straight to my inbox, and this particular one is taken from Proverbs 21:9 concerning marriage and how some behaviors, if left unchecked, can affect the family dynamic and the outcome of such tendencies are not mitigated. The commentary also speaks to young people still in the phase of deciding what type of a person could be a worthwhile spouse, and how best to proceed in this vetting process, including the outcome of getting…

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I Really Should Know Better

8 minutes Today will be a short one as I am running on no sleep at all. Yesterday was a tough day for several reasons. I just came back from spending about two weeks in Texas with my family, so coming back to a vacant home was a tough adjustment. Additionally, I had suffered an allergic reaction that had left my left eye swollen, leaving me to deal with an asymmetrical face. To top it off, I was fully immersed in reminiscing about Emma and all that could have been. What’s terrible is that the one person that could commiserate with me,…

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Quiet My Heart

2 minutes Dear Reader, I am a little under the weather today from an allergic reaction. I travelled back from Texas yesterday and it was time well spent with my family. It’s a bit cooler here in New England so I’m staying in and keeping warm. Today is our Emma’s birthday, my angel baby would have been 7 -may her soul rest in peace. Tomorrow is my son’s birthday, so there’s that to look forward to. That aside, I’m going to leave you with this poignant quote that speaks my heart today. “Be careful if you make a women cry, because God counts…

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God Punishes upto the 3rd & 4th Generation? 

4 minutes In yesterday’s post we talked about generational accountability based on this verse. “God does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation, (Exodus 34:7b).” At first glance, it looks like God will punish innocent children for their parents’ sins. But reading the text more carefully shows a different picture. When we zoom out to see the context, we realize that the rest of this chapter describes God’s character, emphasizing that of loyal love. The context involves Moses ascending up to the mountain to finalize…

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Learning Obedience Through Faith | Abraham 

5 minutes Those who wait for God are pilgrim souls that have no tie that will hold them when the definite command is issued; no prejudices that will paralyze their effort when in some strange coming of the light they are commanded to take a pathway entirely different to that which was theirs before; having no interests either temporal or eternal, either material or mental or spiritual, that will conflict with the will of God when that will is made known – G. Campbell Morgan.   In Studying the story of Abraham deeper, this quote describes his disposition as he sojourned through life.…

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His Word is Near 

4 minutes There’s no time spent better than time spent with God. There are blessings in getting to study his word, seeing his image traced in scriptures, understanding his plan for mankind, getting to know his heart, being enveloped in his warm embrace, basking in his love. For lack of a better comparison,  it’s like mining for precious stones. There’s this gem of a verse that I recently discovered in the book of Deuteronomy. God had just finished laying out the blessings and curses of the Israelites should they choose to obey or disobey, respectively. This is the chapter where they are…

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Marriage | God’s Initiative 

2 minutes We find marriage depicted in the first and the last book of the Bible, Genesis and Revelation. Marriage is God’s idea. He is responsible for the institution of marriage, not as we have sullied it; rather, as he had intended it. We can infer God’s plan and purpose for marriage from several verses found in the very first book of his word, Genesis. In 2:22, we see God creating Eve for Adam, from Adam’s rib. In 2:23, Adam declares: “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken…

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A Waiting People

3 minutes If the Lord Jehovah makes us wait, let us do so with our whole hearts; for blessed are all they that wait for Him. He is worth waiting for. The waiting itself is beneficial to us: it tries faith, exercises patience, trains submission, and endears the blessing when it comes. The Lord’s people have always been a waiting people – Charles Spurgeon.  It takes courage to wait and still be strong. Inactivity will usually cause our muscles to atrophy. Our spiritual muscles work the same way. When God commands us to wait on him as he works on us, we…

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Worldly Systems | Politics & Religion

2 minutes A few questions cross my mind as I watch current affairs unfolding on various channels. Are we, the church-bride, ready to meet our groom, Jesus, or are we too distracted playing Christian nationalism and/or progressive Christianity? Are we doing church or are we following the word of God? Are we reading the word of God for ourselves or are we allowing others to mislead us? Are we pursuing righteousness or are we distracted with politics and/or the latest wind of change?  The topic of politics and religion crosses my mind from time to time. As a political major and a…

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The Way Up is Down | Humility

3 minutes Growing up in a home where humility was emphasized, demonstrated, and instilled in us, thank goodness pride isn’t a stronghold we necessarily suffer from. Humility was always touted as one of the greatest virtues one should strive to possess. As I go deeper with my father in his word, I see just how much value he places on humility, the antonym of which is pride. God strongly opposes the proud at heart, despising it enough to fell the haughty in their pride. “God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble”, Proverbs 3:34.  As counterproductive as it may sound,…

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The Bend In The Path | Poem

3 minutes  No journey is a straight line, the twists, turns and corners are what make it an exciting adventure. What are we to make of the forks in the road and the bends in the path? How are we to react when oftentimes, we take two steps forward and one back? In the right company, life should be a beautiful adventure, and putting your hand in God’s hand can make it so. In fact, it is guaranteed to make it so.  A life with God is not a life free of troubles, for after all, we still live in a fallen…

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Touching the Heart of God | Noah 

3 minutes The first covenant God ever made with man was with Noah, a man of the soil. The flood had subsided. All living creatures, save for those in the ark and those at sea, had been washed away to their death. The waters had resided, the ark had come to rest upon the mountains of Ararat. About a year since they had entered the ark, Noah and his entourage exited onto dry land once more. And the unchanging God reaffirmed their mandate to spread out, to be fruitful, and to multiply upon the land in Genesis 9:1&7.  Instinctively, Noah knew to…

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Every Scar Has A Story | Poem

3 minutes The Apostle Paul says in 2 Corinthians 11:30 “If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.” Infact, he instructs in several verses that if one must boast, then they should boast in their weakness, for it is in one’s weakness that Christ is made strong. In application, we all receive woundings on our journeys through life, if we must boast, it is these weaknesses that we will boast about. The scars we accumulate on life’s journeys -and no one escapes unscathed- tell the story of the battles we fought and point to the God…

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Trusting God | King Asa

3 minutes In the book of 2 Chronicles chapters 14 to 16, we find the story of Asa, one of Israel’s more God-fearing kings. We are introduced to him thus: “Asa did what was good and right in the eyes of the Lord his God” 14:2, and “Although he did not remove the high places from Israel, Asa’s heart was fully committed to the Lord all his life” 15:17. He demolished the altars erected to foreign gods in the land of Judah, commanded that only the God of his ancestors be worshipped, and God gave him rest.  When the Cushite army rose…

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The Problem with Babel | Debunking Selfhood

2 minutes Of everything I am learning of my beloved father, self-sufficiency displeases him greatly as it often leads to disobedience. I reckon it’s because he had such profound plans for us that it irks him when we go it alone instead of trusting and obeying him. Our hearts have been wicked since the fall. We keep devising plans that don’t include our creator, plans that are never submitted to him for his stamp of approval, even plans that go directly against his instructions.  Take the case of the tower of Babel, an event that took place in Noah’s generation 429 years…

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The Ambiguous Road | God’s Calling

3 minutes We see God instructing Abram to leave Haran for a new land that Yahweh would direct him to. Terah, Abraham’s father, had received the same call a generation earlier but had settled in Haran and lived out his days there. You see, God’s gifts and calling are without repentance (Romans 11:29). God’s plans remain unthwarted, the choice to plug in and reap the benefit is ours. Terah settled in Haran, short of his destination, and now we find Abram picking up the mantle and carrying on after hearing the calling from God. When God calls to follow, we will have…

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God in the Seasons | Poem

3 minutes If I have learnt anything in my walk with God, it is that he is a God that works in seasons. On the journeys with him, he starts us out gently, gradually building us up bit by bit until we our knowledge of him is built on a solid rock foundation. God works meticulously in our lives, laying brick upon brick through trials and testing. An easy journey, it isn’t; but it gets easier the more we start to identify patterns of his dealings. The journey gets easier when we understand what season we are in, it certainly makes every…

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Wait With Faith

3 minutes Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. So opens the hall of faith book of Hebrews. When we have faith, it is usually for things we want but haven’t yet received. It displeases the Lord when don’t believe that he has good plans for us, or when he question whether he can fulfil his plans for us. The children of Israel missed entering their rest in the promised land precisely because they doubted whether God cared for them at all, and if he was able to keep his promise to them. And…

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In God’s Waiting Room | The Will 

2 minutes I can imagine Adam and Eve being told not to touch the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Did they wonder if it was for a determined period of time? Did they wonder if it was forever, for always? What debates were taking place in their minds or between each other, if at all? Satan had such an easy time getting them off-track, it seems. He convinced them to move without God’s permission; and in that moment, they made a grab for independence. Yet what God had wanted, what God has always wanted for mankind,…

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God’s Waiting Template 

5 minutes I’ll be honest and say that, in my humble opinion, nothing seems more counterproductive than waiting on God.  We can only do it if we learn to walk by faith and not by sight.   How exactly does one sit still in their house as it burns down? How does one not kick and flail about as they drown? How do you hold steady as the boat rocks, intent on throwing you off?  How do you sit still as the walls cave in on you?  © LovingLair (Oct.05.2021)   When God says ‘wait’, know you’re in for a fight. God’s…

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Battleground Zero | Your Identity

3 minutes Even from the garden of Eden, it’s our identity that satan targeted first. In Genesis 3:5, the serpent entices Eve, telling her “for God knows that when you eat from it (the forbidden fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil), your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” In this statement, it’s implied that God was keeping something away from man, withholding something good, something that was keeping him inadequate. It worked, causing Eve to doubt in God’s goodness, thus disobeying him and eating of the fruit. With every…

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Wrestling While Waiting

3 minutes Friends, I did not realize that the Christian walk is characterized by waiting. Stillness, trusting, and waiting -these seem to go hand in hand. There will be the occasional ‘fight!’ command, but waiting is more the norm as we seek to grow in the Lord. Sometimes we will wonder if we are to wait at all. It doesn’t help that we’re never quite sure of what exactly he’s having us wait. We might have an inkling, but we never know for sure. Are we to walk through a door should it open up? Are we to keep waiting? How long before…

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In God’s Waiting Room | Joy Came in the Morning 

4 minutes Fall on your knees and grow there. There is no burden of the spirit but is lighter by kneeling under it. Prayer means not always talking to Him, but waiting before Him till the dust settles and the stream runs clear – F.B. Meyer. Weeping may last for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning – Psalm 30:5. Had anyone told me the hours I spent waiting on God were hours he was using to mend my broken heart and put me back together, I would have waited a lot more cheerfully. Most of what I remember is groping about in darkness…

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In God’s Waiting Room | A Poem by Russell Kelfer

3 minutes Waiting on God can be such a confusing time for us as Christians. Our walk starts with an expressive God beckoning to us, drawing us in with his lovingkindness, enveloping us with his mercy like a warm blanket. We get so comfortable in his embrace as we find our rest from the meaningless tedium or the raging seas. Gradually, we stop sensing God’s presence, and in a panic, we call out to him, and he draws us in again even as the process repeats itself again over time. At some point, as time progresses, we feel like God has gone…

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In God’s Waiting Room | I Finally Understand the Assignment 

3 minutes Waiting on God requires the willingness to bear uncertainty, to carry within oneself the unanswered question, lifting the heart to God about it whenever it intrudes upon one’s thoughts ~ Elisabeth Elliot. I recently became aware that waiting on God is not optional, at least not if one wants it to go well with them. God has had me in his waiting room for most of my life without me really understanding that I am to wait until he speaks. I haven’t been previously aware that going it alone is not really an option for a Christian that’s sold out for God. …

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This Tongue Thing

5 minutes Today I’m writing about a teaching that I myself am sorely in need of. As I continue to ask the Lord to search my heart and bring forth areas in need of repentance, my thought-life comes into sharp focus. For out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks (Matthew 12:24). We are told to “Be careful what you think because your thoughts run your life.” (Proverbs 4:23). When we have known deep pain in the cause of life, it’s easy to let resentment or even bitterness encrust our hearts. Thankfully, that hasn’t been the case. I have always had…

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Man to God | The Human Condition  

3 minutes In my time spent with the Lord, I have identified several states of the human condition vis-a-vis God; man as it relates to God. I’ve attempted to classify our default modus operandi, so to speak, depending on where we are in our life’s journey. We might not necessarily be one or the other as much as we might be on a spectrum of any of these at any one given point.  It’s my intention to order them from our most wretched condition to our most desired condition.  First, we have the unbelievers: these are our atheists who worship at the…

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Debunking Selfhood | Trust Your Instinct?

3 minutes We’ve often heard it said: go with your gut; trust your instinct. Not according to the bible, for it equates acting on instinct to acting like an animal, a brute. Instinct is defined as the inherent disposition of a living organism toward a particular behavior. Because our nature was corrupted from the first man Adam through whom sin entered the world, following our instinct is hardly the best advice as that too would have been corrupted. Instead, we are instructed to rely on God’s spirit through the understanding of his word.  The bible tends to refer to humans in one…

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Debunking Selfhood | Others Better Than Self?  

4 minutes Phil 2:3 KJV “Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem the other better than themselves.” A couple of years ago, I was struggling with emotional pain. Someone had done me and my family wrong and wounded us so very deeply. Over time, as my son and I struggled to rise above all the pain and pettiness, I remember a voice rising within me, saying that they had never been worth my time, and that it was ‘good riddance to bad rubbish’ since they were no longer an active participant in my…

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Battlefield | Win-Loss

3 minutes “No one heals himself by wounding another.” This is a quote by Saint Ambrose of Milan, one of the early Church Fathers from the fourth century (A.D.340 – A.D.397). It resonates with me because I have been on both sides of this quote, the wounded and the one wounding. Truth be told, if we are to be honest, the majority of us are on both sides of this quote at one point or another in our lives. That is why grace and mercy are the most important qualities to have so we can extend them to each other, for we…

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Life is but a Stopping Place

5 minutes Life is but a stopping place, a pause in what’s to be a resting place along the road to sweet eternity. We all have different journeys, different paths along the way. We all were meant to learn some things, but never meant to stay. Our destination is a place far greater than we know. For some, the journey is quicker, for some the journey is slow. And when the journey finally ends, we’ll claim a great reward and find an everlasting peace together with the Lord ~ Nicholas Gordan, Author  July is my birthday month. I opened it by attending…

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Writing for His Pleasure

4 minutes I keep meaning to blog, but I’ve been so busy studying the word that keeping up with the blog keeps being relegated to the back burner. I love writing, and even when I’m not writing here, I’m usually writing elsewhere. I journal every morning and night. I email often -long emails. I take detailed bible study notes which I then type out as I verify the scriptures we looked at in class within their chapter context.  I remember this quote from watching ‘Chariots of Fire’, a movie made about Scotland’s Eric Liddell, a devout Christian famous for winning gold medals…

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Find me in the Word

3 minutes Dear reader, I’ve been gone for a while. April saw me get on a flight to spend a month in Texas visiting with my sisters with mama joining in as well. The weather is beautiful down there, we spent many a lazy afternoon on a mat under the tree in the backyard trading jokes and swapping stories. From reports back home, it was apparent I had escaped some inclement weather up north where they had snow well into the month. Though we had our own frightful thundering of hailstorms the size of golfballs, that cleared right up and we went…

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March of Promise

3 minutes And here, March comes to a close. March the month of spring, of new life and new beginnings. With all its promise, March did not fail to deliver. Infact, it surpassed set goals and expected outcomes. For 2 years now, I felt in my spirit that March was going to be a significant month for me. I wasn’t sure which March, but since my Pilgrim’s Progress journey began a couple of years ago, March 5th marked the day I came to the end of myself and heeded the call to hand over the reigns of my life to God, which…

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Snowy Day | New Season

3 minutes As 2021 continues to unfold, God’s grace continues to pour out along with it. This winter brought us lots of snow on the East Coast where I live in New England, and I for one I’m grateful I don’t have to go out much. For the brave souls that have to leave the warmth of their homes, I pray you all stay snug one way or another. As I watch the winter season unfurling, I can’t help but think of God’s goodness, how he keeps us in the center of his will, how he sustains us by his righteous right hand.…

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But Noah Found Favor in God’s Eyes

3 minutes While God contemplated wiping out mankind from the face of the earth, one man stood out to bridge the gap of continuity. The bible simply introduces him with the phrase: But Noah found favor in Adonai’s eyes (Gen 6:8). A few verses before that, God, distressed at the extent of the wickedness in man’s heart, had decided to limit his lifespan to a mere 120 years, down from eternity before the fall. I will not contend with mankind forever, since they are mere flesh, he resolves (6:3).  Of all the men that lived in that time period, what made Noah…

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Paradise Lost | Redemption Plan

5 minutes Do you know what the word ‘religion’ means? She asked. I didn’t. And so began our first-ever Bible study session. Religion comes from the Latin root-word ‘LIGARE’, which means ‘to bind’, ‘to connect’. RE-LIGARE, Latin for religion, then means ‘to re-connect’. In other words, religion is God’s plan to reconnect with mankind. A re-connection is necessary when the connection has been broken, which was the case in the garden of Eden when man fell into sin.  If you were walking with your child and suddenly find they’re missing, will you keep walking or will you stop to look around and…

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Call on Adonai’s Name

3 minutes The transition simply reads: about this time, men began to call on the name of the Lord (Gen 4:26). What great mysteries such a simple phrase must hold. The world had been created, and man in it to multiply and subdue it. man had fallen, and sin had entered the world; God’s perfect plan, now tarnished. God had spelled out the consequences to man’s sin, graciously clothed in mercy.  The toiling had begun, hard labor of tilling the ground for food; woman had conceived and given birth in great pain -all consequences of the fall. Adam had not heeded the…

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The Height of First Love

4 minutes Falling in love is such a beautiful thing, a glorious space to be in. In this season of my life, I feel my Lord tag at me to pull in closer, lean in, to depend on Him even more, to trust in Him and wait on Him, to lean on Him instead of on my own limited understanding. And as I answer this call, I understand better where these loving feelings are coming from. My Father is the source of the love I feel in my heart. I never want this feeling to end, being in love with my Lord…

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As Fall Falls

3 minutes October has been yet another beautiful month in our household. There has been so much love to go around as God continues to permeate our loving lair with his abiding joy and endless love. He continues to amaze me as He ordains both circumstances and happenstance for His divine purpose in each of our lives.  This fall, God lovingly sent us family to visit for many many days and it has been quite the family gathering. What seemed impossible for several years if not decades, He accomplished effortlessly. Ours is an example of the unity God can bring in a…

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Thriving Peacefully

3 minutes This summer has been sunny and beautiful, both within and without. I ended up traveling a little bit after all, more out of necessity than leisure. Didn’t want to but once I got going, it wasn’t bad at all, I actually enjoyed it! Traveling has a tendency to do that, challenge and uplift all at the same time. My trips to South America, the West Coast and the South did that for me and I have come back feeling happy, peaceful, restful, and generally content with my life. I’ve busied myself with yard work which has been quite uplifting to…

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Narcissism & Toxicity | Godly Relationships 

6 minutes He’s toxic. She’s toxic. They are narcissistic. Leave them. Walk away. Guard your space. Guard your energy. They’ll never change. Give up on them. Walk away. Think of yourself only. Life is short, be happy; your happiness is what matters most. They are not worth the effort. Save yourself. They are not good enough. Push them out. Close the door. Throw away the key. They are not worth your time. You deserve better. You can do better. Start over. Find someone else. The grass is greener… Write. Them. Off. I struggle with the idea of boundaries. It makes me uncomfortable,…

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Apologetics | Answering Difficult Questions

7 minutes Back in April, I watched a documentary titled ‘Already Gone: Answers in Genesis‘. It articulated why children raised as Christians will quit church by the times they get to college. It came down to their legitimate questions about the doctrine of our faith going unanswered by mature christians who lack insight or revelation on how to answer these petulant questions, which, when answered, should help ground our faith. Premised on the ‘intelligent design’ versus the ‘evolution theory’ debate, the documentary contended that the first time a child asks a question and it’s answered with ‘just pray’, or ‘just believe’, we…

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The Witness of Christ | Living Epistles

7 minutes And I, if I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all men to Myself – John 12:32. Hello everyone, July has been a special month for me. I had a birthday on the 8th and spent it quietly at home with my son. I’d like to say it’s because of Covid, but I think it’s exactly how I would have spent it anyway, pandemic or not. I love my home and I love being home. It’s my favorite place and I have been super blessed and extremely privileged to be able to stay safe within its confines for…

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Abiding Joy | Thanking you all 

5 minutes There is a deep joy within me. I didn’t know I could be this happy. Nobody told me. Actually, people did tell me but I didn’t really believe them. I thought I would be sad endlessly… There is an end to all things. Trouble does come to an end. To quote Psalm 30:5, ‘weeping may endure for the night, but joy comes in the morning.’ Friends, my morning joy came a couple of months ago. It’s a magical time in my life, sweet release. My trust in my Father is so complete and I truly lack nothing.  The few dreams…

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Higher Ground | Attic Life

5 minutes We have had such lovely sunny days and I’m so enjoying my time home at home with my boys -let me explain. My son Jan has been travelling for years now. He’s been taking his friends along with him on most of his inter-continental trips. Now with international flying at a standstill as we continue to try and flatten the curve, the boys have been left planless. Lucky for me, our home has become the meeting point of their young minds. I cannot adequately describe how happy and blessed this makes me feel! You see, I grew up in a…

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My Father’s Guidance | June heartcheck 

5 minutes Hey friends!! I hope you’re all doing well as summer progresses. As for me, I have never been as well as I am right now. June has been such a good month! My Father has been holding my hand tenderly, walking me through some of the more mature lessons as I graduate from drinking spiritual milk to eating spiritual meat (see 1 Corinthians 3:1-3 and Hebrews 5:12). It’s amazing how He knows exactly where we are and how He gently guides us to where we need to be; all we need to do is call on Him and yield our…

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Heart-Check in May

3 minutes As I write this, my page is under maintenance mode; so I am writing behind the scenes. It’s Sunday evening, the last day of May. I have spent a quiet day at home with my son and his friends and we all just came back from our evening walk around our neighborhood. I love it here, my hometown. I love how deep we are nestled in the suburbs, yet just a 15 minute walk will get you to our city right on Main Street; such an ideal location to be raising my son in. We are super blessed that our…

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April Heart Check

5 minutes As April comes to a close, I think back to what a victorious month this has been for me. January was peaceful and restful. February was pressured and numbing. In March I was fretting and trying to figure out the way forward in both my personal and professional life. April has been my most relaxed and happiest month yet this new decade as a 7-day hibernation over the Easter weekend saw me emerge refreshed and restored in more ways than I had anticipated. I’ve never been more sure of myself in Christ than I am in this season. I’m watching…

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A heart-check this March

8 minutes With everything that’s going on in the world, March has been a tough month. The pandemic that’s been visited upon us has really taken its toll. I feel myself slumping into the lull it’s pulled us all into as my life slows down a bit more each new day. At first, I didn’t even notice it. I was so consumed with my own life that I hadn’t paused long enough to assess the unfolding events. The border shutdowns found me on a leisurely 5-day maiden trip to South Africa just because I could and I had some free time on…

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Cultivating Character | Fruit of the Spirit

3 minutes But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience (forbearance), kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control ~ Galatians 5:22-23 Dear Reader, this season I have decided on writing a series centered on character development, specifically, cultivating femininity within the area of character. Why, you ask? Because the area of our character is one of particular interest to our heavenly father; it’s the reason He is continuously pruning and molding us. Several verses in the Bible make reference to God being the potter and us being the clay (Isaiah 29:16; Isaiah 64;8; Jeremiah 18:1-9; Romans 9:14-24) ‘Like clay in…

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The Joy of Serving Another

3 minutes Hello everyone, how I’ve missed you all here on the blog! The year started with some zest and I had quite a bit planned. In just a month and a week in, I have traversed a great distance and the change of scenery has done me wonders in terms of giving me a fresh perspective on my life and how things are going. I have had a chance to re-evaluate my position on quite a few things and I finally feel ready to make some key changes that I believe will result in a richer life experience going forward. I’m…

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Year in Review | 2019

22 minutes Ps: Click here for my decade in Review Post. 2019 was the end of an era for me. So many changes took place, none of which I wanted but had to take in stride, yet all of which have resulted in good. After doing the 2010s decade in review, I thought it would be interesting to do an annual review as well, seeing as it was a pivotal year for me and my loved ones. Our past informs our future in that it helps us see what we can incorporate going forward as well as what we should leave behind.…

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A Decade in Review | The End of 2010s

15 minutes   Ps: Click here for my 2019 Year in Review Post.   Hiya, as the 2010-decade comes to an end, I thought to undertake the introspective task of looking back to identify milestones, crossroads and turning point. It’s worth seeing how far we’ve come, what steps we took that moved us forward, what steps moved us backwards, and when we stood still. 2010 – the year of new beginnings Highlight: Relocated from Belgium to the US to join my husband | Mother-in-Law died Emotional health: Peaceful 2010 found me in love, eager to be reconnected with my then brand-new husband,…

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A Very Merry Christmas to you all!

4 minutes Hey you all, I want to wish you a fabulous day today as you celebrate Christmas. I’m sure we all remember the reason for the season. Today, love came into the world. Well, not quite today today, but around this season. Still let’s go with it and celebrate the birth of our Christ. My Pastor has been preaching a series on Jesus, explaining how many of us are stuck on Jesus as a baby in a manger. Others think of him as the twelve-year-old at the temple. Others yet see him crucified. He warned about the danger of being stuck…

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In Pursuit of Peace | Becoming a Peacemaker

8 minutes Becoming a peacemaker is one of the hallmarks of Christian maturity, that’s probably why it took me a little longer to learn. By nature, I am not a fighter. Whenever I’ve found myself accused of something, it’s generally not in my nature to defend myself. I am actually quite reticent, and I’ll walk away before I’ll defend myself. I’ll let people talk bad about me and not correct them. I’ll let people tell lies and just shrug it off. It’s not to say I am unaffected; I learnt a long time ago that people will always think what they want…

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Standing in the Gap | The Ministry of Intercession

10 minutes We come to the Lord because others stood in the gap and intercede for us when we were lost in the far country. Someone pleaded our case to the Father, causing heaven to act on our behalf: for when we pray, heaven moves; if we stop, heaven stops. When there is an unrelenting intercessor standing and contending for us, it changes everything. Prodigals eventually return home, as long as someone is praying for them. and we watch the road until they do… for we do not leave our wounded behind.

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A Prodigal’s Return | A Homecoming  

5 minutes The prodigal story paints such vivid imagery, beautifully shining a light on a father’s deep and unconditional love for his son; a father rending his garments to run up to meet, embrace and welcome back home a lost child. We humans are fair-weathered and we break our promises all the time, whether with man or God, causing us to wander off to create a life we think we deserve. Yet there is no reward in prodigal living. The truth is we are all hungry for love and we have a Father that has plenty of love to give, effortlessly and without keeping score. God is waiting for you with open arms, run into His warm embrace. He is calling you just as you are. Stop resisting and come home.

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Encountering a Loving God | Story Time

6 minutes To think I fretted that all God had for me was salvation from damnation and nothing more; O how wrong I was! I’ve been over here doing mad exploits with my Father all year long! I ascertained quite early on that walking this walk with my Savior would mean trusting Him, gingerly putting one foot in front of the other and doing my best to walk as I sense Him leading. I feel blessed that I serve a God that reaches down to mankind to save him; immortal God pursuing mortal man for salvation from eternal damnation, and for participation in His divine plan for the salvation of mankind. He has done so much for me, how can I not love a God like this? It’s His love for me that keeps me at His feet; how can I not but worship Him?

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Unmuting God: My Lord Speaks | Story Time 

8 minutes How can an omni-present God who is everywhere be this elusive to find? How can a God said to be reaching out to humanity to save them be this hard to find? But He did find me. He fought for me in the battle over my soul and won for me. He didn’t stop there but kept whispering for me to seek Him; He wanted to be found by me! Dear ones, how He longs for us… He created us for communion with Him; we mustn’t keep dishonoring that desire, leaving Him out of our lives. While the truth is that He was chasing after me all along, the plot twist is that I now chase after him, my heart panting after Him as a deer pants for water. Because He has inclined His ear to me, I will praise Him till I have no breath…

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My Father’s Relentless Pursuit | Story Time

6 minutes I remember when I began to suspect that it wasn’t just my imaginings, and that it was really God calling out to me to turn to Him and take refuge in His fortress. It would take another full month before I would put two and two together and realize that it really was God intervening in my life, and that His Holy Spirit was tugging at my heartstrings. Startled, I awoke to the battle over my soul.

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Making Idols of Men | Story Time

5 minutes Much to my surprise, I found I was a much more tolerant person away from church, thus reinforcing the belief that I was doing just fine spiritually. Organized religion had not worked for me and I wanted nothing to do with it. Christianity’s claim to exclusivity as the only way to God didn’t sit right with me. Its lack of acceptance for any deviation from what was considered ‘accepted Christian practice’ vexed my spirit. The vilification of otherness irked me and Christianity’s general haughty attitude irritated me. I certainly hadn’t encountered the love ‘they’ were supposed to practice, at least not in its full measure of mercy and grace.

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December is for Christmas

4 minutes Dear Reader, we interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to say hello and reconnect with you all in our cozy little community here. November ended on a high note after our thanksgiving celebrations, and since our Christmas tree was already up, we effortlessly rolled into Christmas festivities with no hinderances. Our tree is up, lights and all. We are yet to get gift boxes under the tree though; I’ve been meaning to go shopping soon but I haven’t been to Amsterdam in about 3 weeks now -it’s the longest I haven’t been these past couple of years and it feels weird.…

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How I settled For an Indifferent God | Story Time

10 minutes The biggest lie the enemy sells us is that God is indifferent. I was surprised to learn that I am not the only one that had fallen for the lie, that there were others too, that there was nothing original about the enemy, that he always recycles the same lies to the hapless, the undiscerning. I flash back to the year 2006 when, after almost a decade of a futile search for God, I came to the conclusion that while He is unquestionably good, God really was just indifferent to the finer details of our lives, and that it was up to us to make our way through life best we can, all while hoping He doesn’t smite us dead should we happen to get it wrong. Read on…

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A Happy Thanksgiving

6 minutes Dearest Reader, It’s thanksgiving weekend here in the USA and as such, I wanted to wish you all a lovely thanksgiving weekend. Thank you for bestowing upon me your most precious gift, that of your time and attention – taking time out of your day to stop by and read the blog. I pray God’s blessings over your life in this season of your life, may your thanksgiving tables be filled with love and laughter. I hope you all have a wonderful time with your family and all your loved ones. Cheers, ღ Helena ღ

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The Lion’s Lair | Loving Lair

4 minutes Christ is often symbolized as a lion in the Bible, imagery intended to communicate leadership, strength, ferocity, power, splendor and majesty. As a symbol, the lion represents rulership, kingship, fierce and powerful. The Psalmist in 76:2 calls God’s dwelling place in Zion –his lair: “his den has been in Salem, his lair in Zion.” It is my prayer that as we make a worthy home for his word in our hearts, may we not forget or overlook each other.

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Loving Lair | A loving community

3 minutes Few things bring me as much joy as using the depth of my voice and the cadence of my language to communicate creative interests and ultimately to nurture our growing community here on the blog. I am keenly conscious of the fact that these stories we tell here are not just my perspectives and experiences. Rather, these are our stories culled from all our collective experiences. We take what we’ve been given and enrich each other’s lives through shared experiences, cultivating vulnerability in ourselves and in those with whom we share our stories. Welcome to the blog dear Reader, our journey continues.

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Loving Lair | A loving story

5 minutes The word ‘Loving’ has always held a fascination for me for the last decade of my life, I have wanted to use it as far back as I can remember, but the timing to use it was never quite right as it wasn’t all up to me. Additionally, and perhaps more distressing, I myself was struggling with love since I wasn’t connected to the endless source of love and kept running dry as a result.

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Loving Lair | A Faith Lifestyle Blog

6 minutes The name, “Loving Lair”, comes from a deep desire to become love, and to create loving spaces in our literal homes as well as our literary world here on the blog. As we create loving lairs for our loved ones at home, we unearth and uncover within us a drive to beautify, displaying an interesting mix of creativity and whimsy. Our aesthetics communicate warmth and tranquility, even as we focus on creating homes that are founded on love.

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Grey Dynasty – Inspiring a Life Daringly Imagined

5 minutes This season marks four years since I started this blog. I’d had the intention for several years and eventually took the plunge and launched Grey Dynasty in the fall of 2015. Over the years, I’ve blogged on sustainable fashion, travel, and matters of faith and lifestyle, sharing my musings aimed at inspiring us all to live a life daringly imagined, as the tagline reads, courtesy of Mr. Grey. I’ve enjoyed sharing bits of myself here and I’m quite content that a piece of me lives on the internet, for indeed that was my goal when I first started -to leave…

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Lifestyle: An Unfortunate Morning

4 minutes Last weekend was lovely as the family gathered to celebrate Jan’s birthday, including a few of Jan’s friends who stayed for a sleepover. In total, we had 8 people over. For all intents and purposes, it was a most harmonious and successful gathering and my son had a really lovely time, as did everyone else. Mr. Grey kept the drinks flowing so the boys were thoroughly entertained with gaming while the girls watched Stranger Things on Netflix. It was the first time Jan and I have had any number of people at our new home; I was tempted to call…

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My Father Series: Holy Spirit

4 minutes Part of the holy trinity, the most neglected part, yet the part that walks with us. Without the Holy Spirit we would not be able to walk with our loving Father. Notably, the Holy Spirit is a person. He was there during the creation of the earth (Genesis 1:1-2), there when they made man (let us make man in our image – Genesis 1:26). He was there at the conception of the son of God (Luke 1:30-35). He was there at the baptism of Jesus in the River Jordan (Mark 1:9-11). And he is here with us as sure as…

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Lifestyle: Another Birthday

3 minutes Dear Reader and welcome to the Friday Blog. If you’re reading this on Friday morning, I’m currently flying back to the US from Amsterdam. I am scheduled to pick Jan up straight from campus since yesterday was his birthday, making this is his Birthday weekend and we are celebrating! I thought of us flying somewhere together but his class schedule didn’t permit it, so we decided to just have a chilled one at home, first catch a movie and then cook up a storm. I’ll even bake a cake like we used to every Sunday all those years ago in…

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My Father Series: The Resurrection Power

7 minutes Welcome to the Sunday blog dear Reader. Today’s post is a new revelation for me on this journey to the throne of God my Father. After last Sunday’s blog on ‘The Case for Christ’, the subject of the resurrection of Christ was looming large in my mind. Surprisingly, I found that once again I knew very little about this topic, and that I’ve never given it much thought. It’s not that I’ve not believed it, no. I’ve simply never questioned it or tried to grappled with the implications thereof for me as a child of the most high. The power…

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Lifestyle: Redeeming Time

4 minutes Hello dear Reader, this Friday finds me home not doing whatever it is that normal people do whenever they are home. I only worked a day all week so I’ve been home a while. You’d think I’d get some good rest, but it seems my body has maintained my flying schedule as I’ve still been sleeping in intervals of 2-3 hours at a time. So much quiet time, I must say, yet somehow time is never enough. Between doing my daily Bible study, listening to sermons and writing blogposts, I seem to be maxed out! I think it’s ridiculous as…

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My Father Series: The Case for Christ

8 minutes Normally, foundational classes in Christianity begin with Christ and the salvation he brings us. Rightfully so as he is the cornerstone upon which the church is built. Yet here on the blog, I left this post for later. The reason is that, for me, it was the hardest part of the God-story to believe, and the last piece of the puzzle to click into place. I’ve never disputed that there is a creator; the universe didn’t make itself. The Big Bang theory has always sounded absurd to me as I see no way where chaos randomly organize themselves into intelligent…

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Lifestyle: A Solemn Week

4 minutes Hello Reader and welcome back to the lifestyle blog. I’ve had a solemn week, understandably so as I’ll explain in a bit. Jan and I had a lovely weekend at home, I didn’t take him back to campus until Monday morning. He’s doing fine and his spirits are high, always a good thing for a mother to hear. October is his birthday month, so I guess my nostalgia is understandable as I feel particularly blessed to have him in my life. The more I embrace the principles of stewardship, the more grateful I feel that my Father entrusted him to…

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My Father Series: Be Transformed, Renew Your Mind

8 minutes It’s paradoxically comforting and disheartening to learn that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Disheartening because how can we have hope where nobody else has succeeded, and comforting because we don’t like to be alone in these things (misery loves company). The bible points us to Christ as the one man that had lived and not sinned, and he is the example we are to emulate as we grow in our Christian faith. Quoting the prophet Isaiah (53:9), the Apostle Paul tells us in his first epistle of Peter 2:22 “To this you were…

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October is for Birthdays

4 minutes Dear friend, October is here again and autumn weather will soon be upon those of us in the Northern hemisphere. I can’t say I’m looking forward to it, but I’m thankful to be able to experience it. I love that this time around, I’m in this new place of rebirth and renewal, no longer wondering how much longer my life will hold for. Even as other things are dying, my spirit is being renewed and hope springs eternally. It’s a time when what’s not needed is buried, either to die or sprout again when the season turns. I can think…

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My Father Series: Christ in the Old Vs. New Tension

3 minutes I am a mystery to myself, for I want to do what is right, but end up doing what my moral instincts condemn… For I know that nothing good lives within the flesh of my fallen humanity. The longings to do what is right are within me, but willpower is not enough to accomplish it. My lofty desires to do what is good are dashed when I do the things I want to avoid. So if my behavior contradicts my desire to do good, I must conclude that it’s not my true identity doing it, but the unwelcome intruder of…

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Turning the Corner

4 minutes Hello my lovely friends! I hope you’re all doing as well as I am, and that you’re all thriving in your daily endeavors. September has been a pivotal month for me on the journey to my new life. Perhaps it’s because I moved house and changed scenery, I don’t know, but it’s the month where I seem to have turned the corner and now I’m basking in bright eternal sunshine. Somehow this month, the sun shone through against all odds. The clouds parted and the sunshine peeked through, bright and resilient as ever. The gloom lifted. The pain parted, ostensibly…

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My Father Series: The Old & The New Tension

4 minutes Dear reader, welcome to the Sunday blog. So far we’ve looked at how we can best position ourselves to be found by God; how to get in the Word and learn about our loving Father; and how to find our identity in Christ and seeing ourselves as God sees us and not as the world might seek to define us. At this point, the expectation is that we have been inviting our loving Father into our lives daily, asking Him to draw us closer to Him. We’ve also been studying the Bible daily to get to know our Father and…

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My Father Series: How to Find Your Identity in Christ

6 minutes Hello reader and welcome to our Sunday blog. Finding my identity in Christ was my most panicked search on my journey to the Father. My life was overrun with weeds and negativity and I was drowning under a barrage of insults that I intellectually knew was untrue, but emotionally, I was succumbing to the name-calling and even beginning to question my identity as I noticed myself slipping and losing the battle with reality and the truth of who I was. I wasn’t anchored to anything in particular and thus had nothing to ground me. When my dearest friend Vanessa saw…

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Discovering the Neighborhood

3 minutes Hello friends, two weeks have gone by in our new place and I must say, we really are quietly blossoming there. I love coming home to family, to people that love unconditionally. We are all doing so very well life is unfolding quite meaningfully I might add. Circumstances worked out such that my son Jan stayed home longer and I didn’t drop him off to move-in on campus until just this week. This gave him an opportunity to explore the neighborhood and to bond with his nieces and we’ve had some lovely times of getting to know one another. It…

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Debunking Selfhood: You’ve Got This

3 minutes This is probably the subtlest of them all. I hear it preached from the podium all the time. I hear it indiscriminately from my Christian friends. It is meant to encourage. The phrase ‘I’ve got this’ is meant to bolster one’s confidence in their ability to get something done, to overcome something, to not give up, to persevere to the end. You’ve got this. It’s harmless. But it’s also toothless. What exactly is it that we have when we say we’ve got this? Looking underneath the hood, is there anything there that we really have? Philippians 4:13 tells me that…

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My Father Series: Finding God in His Word

5 minutes Hello friend and welcome back to my Sunday blog. I am in the middle of a 6-day stretch of off-days here at home and loving spending time with my family while sharing God’s Word. I hope you’re having equally loving times of refreshing in your homes. Last Sunday we talked about how we can allow ourselves to be found by God. We found that simply asking and inviting Him to reveal Himself to us will start us down the path of being sensitized to His presence. As we sense Him near, a need will start to arise within us, an…

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Settling In Well

4 minutes Hello my beautiful friends, I hope you are all doing well. I am doing splendid! All is well in our home and we’re settling in gradually. No, we are not completely unpacked as there are still a few more boxes to go, but by and large, we are a fully functioning family with many of the essentials in place -which really boils down to having a place to sleep. I’ve been at work all week as usual but my schedule allows me to be home every weekend, of which I’m so very grateful as I get to spend time with…

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Debunking Selfhood: the myth & folly of self

3 minutes Even I fell into the trap, the lie of self. For the longest time, I stayed away from grandiose expressions of self; it always somehow rubbed me the wrong way. Having grown up in a Christian home with good solid Christian values, my belief in God has always been firmly rooted in the Bible with God at the center of everything. Evolving from God as the center of everything to elevating the self as the center of our universe is a journey that is so subtle it’s easy to miss the nuances until our house of cards comes tumbling down.…

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My Father Series: How to be found by God

3 minutes Hello friend and welcome back to my Sunday blog. I’ve had a busy and fulfilling week away at work and just got back home yesterday for the weekend. Today being Sunday, I thought to write a post on our loving Father and how we can be found by Him. Of all the days of the week, today seems like a lovely day to spend some time in His presence so we can be found by Him. Here’s a verse that I find intriguing, especially having recently experienced it myself. Jesus is speaking in John 6:44 “If the Father who sent…

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Thanking my Father for Family

5 minutes My Father decided that my son and I didn’t have to face the move alone. Isn’t He a good Father? He sent my younger sister Terry and her family to come and help us in this trying time. At first I didn’t understand, erroneously assuming the worst of it was behind me. In His all-knowing wisdom, He knew it wasn’t, and so He sent help. While I was away attending to other official matters of this wrap up, Terry packed up my things best she knew how and by the time I got back, she had all bags, boxes, suitcases…

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My Moving Weekend

4 minutes I watched him, as he casually dropped it, this, my heart; flicking it to the wind like the ashes of a cigarette that had lost its fire. I silently screamed, sensing the danger of pain. Moving to rescue it from its downward plummet, I sensed the lateness of the hour. Gone was the opportunity to run from rejection, the die had been cast, the deed had been done. Without hesitation, without thought. So happy was I to find a willing candidate to stand guardian over my love, I abdicated my post as the keeper of my heart. With no formal…

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Entering my Father’s Rest

5 minutes It’s the quiet after the storm, and I’m in a good place in my life. Calm waters all around and blue skies up ahead. At the invitation of my Father, I have found my rhythm in my maker and I am learning to rest in Him. In secular terms, we would say ‘Ms. Grey is getting her groove back’. And it would be true, I am getting my groove back. I am resting well in my Father’s bosom, quietly watching the world go by, as a child nestled, nuzzling on his mother’s breast. My heart is quiet and I want…

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My Father is Rebuilding my Foundation

6 minutes “I will show you what it’s like when someone comes to me, hears my words, and puts them into practice. He is like a man who chooses the right place to build a house and then lays a deep and secure foundation on the bedrock. When the storms and floods rage against that house, it continues to stand strong and unshaken through the tempest, for it has been wisely built on the right foundation. But the one who has heard my teaching and does not obey it is like a man who builds a house without laying any foundation whatsoever.…

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With Friends in Dallas TX

3 minutes Hi everyone, Last week I flew down to our company’s headquarters in Dallas Texas for our annual recurrent training. Out of our graduation class of 60 in 2017, there were about 15 of us scheduled to take our re-qualification tests on the same day, so it felt like a reunion of sorts, meeting everyone and getting updates on their life happenings. Some have married, others have divorced. Some are now engaged while others have had children. One was let go and three others quit -and so on and so forth. I shared my news and I couldn’t help bursting into…

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Loving like my Father

8 minutes The ground rule remains consistent: whenever in doubt, choose love. Love is always the answer. Love is the way. Love is the only way. The closer my Father draws me near, the more He lays bare this simple truth -He distills all our options to just one -Love. God’s word provides for nothing else but to love. Vengeance is not ours but the Lord’s (Romans 12:19); this leaves us nothing but to love. We are told not to let our anger lead us to sin (Ephesians 4:26), that leaves us nothing but to love. For every negative emotion we could…

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